Wednesday, April 30, 2008

I Need Some Friends...

..or at least one. Welcome to my pity party.

I have a few friends. My BFF from high school lives in LA and while I love her to death, I rarely see her. But when I do it's great! My closest pal that lived near me moved to freaking halfway across the country and I only talk to her about once every 3 weeks. I have a very close friend who I talk to a lot but she lives far away too. Which is a major bummer because I love her to death and know that she would be "the one" (lol) if only she was closer. Boo whoo!

I had a very close friend that was married to my step brother. She basically lost her mind in a meth-infused breakdown and we have lost touch. I am glad because she has become someone that I would never even associate with. Not so much because of the drugs-everyone f's up. I guess I just have a thing about being friend with total pathological liars, manipulators, and over all nutballs. This person is not just a little crazy but clinically insane. Which is weird because in the 2+ years we were close, she did not convey the crazy at her apparent full capacity. She's making up for that now. But that in itself is a whole different story. (One that I am sure that I will talk about here eventually.)

Anyway, I wonder what happened to all my pals? I don't have that one really good pal that I can confide in and talk to about ANYTHING. The one I can call and make her go to farmers market with at the last minute, or who I can call just to chat with. I have some close blogger friends who I really cherish and am so happy to have "met." I feel closer to some of them than I do some of my friends I have in "real life." Maybe it's because they can't judge me, at least to my face.

My lack of friends, it's my fault too. Becoming a mom has made me lazy. And picky. And I have been bad about being a friend too. And being married has made it a wee difficult because my husband has friends I like who have super annoying wives or girlfriends whom I hate. What's wrong with me?

I guess this comes from me wanting to go for girls night out in a few weeks for my birthday and realizing that I have no one to go with....


Tuesday, April 29, 2008

I Have Blogger ADD/Sex

So as you will see I have not quite figured out how I want this blog to look. I like pink though, so that's good! i added some music at the bottom. (Love that song, Mercy. Love it.) I may be making more changes in the weeks to come. We will see...Moving on.

Let's talk about SEX. I think most of the tenants in the Pink Apartment are moms. And alot of moms have the same problem, uh, issue....lack of sex.

For me, it's a combo of how disgustingly fat I have become poor body image, and exhaustion from chasing kids around all day. My husband is great and assures me that he still finds me hot as ever and yadda, yadda, yadda, but I still feel really...just, well, gross. I guess having 2 kids in 3 years will do that to you. Well that, and cheese. And chocolate. And carbs. And wine.

Take my new poll and tell me about your sex life, or lack there of.

Monday, April 28, 2008

And Now I Get a Tad Political

So we all know a little bit about Jeremiah Wright and his crazy comments including the assertion that the United States brought on the 9/11 attacks with its own "terrorism." He has made statements suggesting that the US government created AIDS.

More quote ables from Wright
"The government gives them the drugs, builds bigger prisons, passes a three-strike law and then wants us to sing 'God Bless America.' No, no, no, God damn America, that's in the Bible for killing innocent people," he said in a 2003 sermon. "God damn America for treating our citizens as less than human. God damn America for as long as she acts like she is God and she is supreme."

Today at the National Press Club he stated lied that his words were taken out of context. You can listen to the speech here .

You can listen to his ideals about whites suppressing the black community, inventing AIDS and WMD's here.

Today he was given the opportunity to defend his words, and he said that this was not about himself, or Barack Obama but it was an attack by the media and America against black churches.

Any thoughts on this?

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Calling all Moms

The same kid that is having issues with saying please is 27 months. She is really smart and has great verbal skills. She has always been ahead of her age group in books and what not. So why does she only have like a %10 interest in potty training?

She has a musical potty, magazine, princess panties and the whole 9 yards. She even gets marshmallows when she goes.

So mommy's of the Pink Apartment, got any tricks that you want to share for potty training?

I guess that I should mention that we waited to potty train until after her sister was born. We wanted to make sure that we had the ability to be consistent and also felt that the transition period of having a new sibling would be too much all at once.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

A Letter to My Kid

Dear 2 year old kid,

Don't you get it by now that if you don't say please you will not get raisins, yogurt, markers, or anything else that you want? Can't you understand that I hate not being able to give you what you want merely because you are being stubborn and won't say the magic words? Don't you realize that it's polite and courteous to say PLEASE?

I know that you can say it considering that you speak in sentences now and always that THANK YOU, THANKS MOM, THANK YOU VERY MUCH and other various forms of gratitude.

So why why why why why won't you just say please? Even when I won't give you want you want, you still won't say it! What's the deal?

Your Mother

Monday, April 21, 2008

Health Insurance

Today I get a letter from my girls' pediatrician saying that they no longer accept our insurance. Great! Just what I wanted to hear on a Monday morning. So I call the doc and see how much it will cost for the girls next round of vaccines if we pay cash. After the 30% discount for paying cash, it would have been about $400 for kid # and $600 for kid #2! Oh yeah and that doesn't include the $144 per kid physical charge.

Just when I am about to bang my head on the desk, the billing guy says "But why don't you just take them to the health department? They charge a flat fee."

Ok, I said.

I called the health department. Wanna know what they charge? $25.00. Yes, that's right twenty-five dollars. Not $25.00 per vaccine. Nope. They charge a $25.00 "office fee" and then the vaccines are free.

Feeling like this is sounding way too good to be true, I ask her if that's based on your income, is it a sliding scale? (We are self employed so we wouldn't likely qualify)

They just charge $25.00.
No strings.
No deductible.
No premiums.
Just twenty five stinking dollars.

Friday, April 18, 2008

SIbling #3?

Sooo. how many kids you have? I have 2. And they are close together (only 20 months apart). Motherhood is a joy. I love it. Most days. My husband is very helpful with the kiddos. He also is appreciative of the fact that I make dinner and keep house and all that. He always jokes that there is no way that he would want to switch positions with me.

So when our first was born, we were elated! I actually thought that we would have trouble conceiving because we had a few miscarriages before and I am ovarian challenged. (I only have 1 ovary.) But after a year of no B/C method, we found out we were expanding. And I don't mean just my waistline. Fast forward 1 year and we discover...SURPRISE! Baby # is getting a sibling. Once again we were thrilled, but surprised.

Don't get me wrong, these were the best surprises I have ever gotten. I am so loving how they are beginning to interact with each other. They love thier dad and they are great kids. Both sleep well and have been a joy. I pray that they will have a strong relationship. The kind that only sisters can share. The kind that I don't know about because I am the lone girl in a sea of brothers.

A very good friend of mine just had her fist baby. He's precious. My friend comes from a family of 5. A VERY CLOSE family of five. They are all pretty close in age, and they are all best friends. Seriously. Best friends. They all spend time with eachother. And now that some of her sibs are married, thier spouses are just as close too.


I really am. My family is not close. My folks are divorced. I get along great with my dad and his wife. My mom and I have a strained relationship, but it's ok. But it's not anything that is super fantastic. My husband is only really in contact with his mom and 1 sibling and they are both nuts. Once again, did I mention that I am really wanting a big family where everyone loves each other and wants to be together?

So that bring us to many more kids should we have? My hubs used to say 4 until our oldest got to be 2 and a bit of a hurricane. I know that it's not right to have kids for the sake of creating some big loving family, right? Or is that what we are supposed to encourage? I don't know. I want more kids....I think. Once my oldest is in kindergarten. That seems like a good time, right?

My kiddos are 27 months and 7 months right now. When do you think is the right time to start thinking about more?

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Speak Now

Ok, so a very good friend of my hubs is engaged. He is engaged to the most obnoxious, arrogant, petty, ridiculous, immature, selfish beeotch that I have ever met. In fact, I can't even stand to be around her so if I have to, I generally drown my sorrows in beer. It's that bad. They fight over things like..... She's always complaining about money, even though she doesn't have a job. So when he wants to drive her small car to work to save money on gas (he drives a full sized truck) she bitches. Or she doesn't want him to drink but she smokes pot. Or she tags along when he goes on guys fishing trips. She has also belittled him in front of others and continually butts in when he needs alone or guy time. She is pretty much just an idiot. I n the past she has called me old, criticized my choice of flowers in my garden, and questioned my parenting--even thought she has now kids and is like 23.

Now, my hubs and I love our alone time. We need it. We think it's important to have a good relationship. And we rarely fight. So maybe I am partial. But I can't imagine being married to this.

So my husband is in the wedding. And it's back east and we are going and all that. I would never stand up and object, but isn't it like our responsibility to counsel him or something. She wants to have kids right away and while he doesn't I could totally she her getting knocked up to lock him in.

I know that our pal is a big boy and can make decisions for himself. But he's already said that they have stayed together out of being comfortable.

Are we supposed to say something? Or are we to forever hold our peace?


I have been feeling very stressed the past few weeks about something that I hate being stressed about. MONEY. It seems like my hubs and I have been on track for a while, even expanding our business at one point. Now suddenly it seem that the economy has caught up with us and we are feeling the strain big time. It's been a long time since I worried about paying bills and things. I am grateful for that. I do feel blessed that we have been successful in past years. I guess I just hate worrying about things like money. I know that's it's simply a season. A season that we have visited before and mostly likely will visit again. I wish I could just give it all up and not stress out like I have been. But it's making me moody and depressed and scared.

It's times that these that I think about smoking the most. Sometimes being an adult sucks. But who am I kidding, most of the time it's bliss.

Monday, April 14, 2008


I finished our taxes! And despite my initial fears, we made out ok and are actually getting a small refund! Woo whoo for itemized deductions!

I now have a total new respect for CPAs. You people are mathematical geniuses. I do not envy you one single bit.

And now...I am going to get ready to type my first post about my MIL.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

More Bad Habits

Wanna know something about me that I HATE? I hate that I am such a procrastinator. Here it is April 13, and what am I still working on? Our taxes. Yep, I totally waited till the last minute. Why do it do this? Now instead of realxing with a nice glass of wine (who am I kidding!) or working on household chores, I am slaving away at the computer getting brain fry.

Our computer crashed in August of last year and I never went back to check that all of our recipets were still entered. Well, they weren't. So now, at my own doing, I am stuck going through each bank statement to make sure that we get all the deductions that we are allowed.

It's really not fun. And what makes it worse is that I have had several months to do this, and never did.

Are you a procrastinator? What do you always wait till the last minute to do? And if you are not a procrastinator, what's your secret?????

Saturday, April 12, 2008

A Little About Me

  1. I do have another blog. My family reads it. My friends read it. My mother in law stalks it. I soooo needed this place to vent and get it all out.
  2. While I don't believe in astrology, I am a Taurus, but I don't tend to be stubborn.
  3. I got married at 24.
  4. I had my first kid at 26.
  5. Before I was domesticated, I used live at the bar.
  6. And where ever they sold shoes and clothes.
  7. I worked really hard at the same job for almost 10 years before I became a mom.
  8. Now I work even harder to stay at home and take care of 2 kids (ages 2.5 and 7 months)
  9. I love to cook. I love to eat.
  10. This would explain why I have gained about 50 lbs in the last 5 years. Well, the food and being pregnant for like 3 years straight.
  11. I am very proud that I quit smoke three years ago.
  12. I am disappointed that I still think about it all the time.
  13. I love cleaning products and things that smell good.
  14. I hate that I complain so much when life is actually really good.
  15. My husband is beyond amazing, and I am not just saying that. We get along great.
  16. I hate play groups.
  17. I never feel like I accomplish what I want to in a day.
  18. I like Pinot Grigio, Martini's and Corona's with lime.
  19. I miss not having any responsibilities.
  20. I own a successful business with my husband.
  21. My parents divorced when I was 12 and my mom and I have a strained relationship on the inside. On the outside we pretend that things are ok.
  22. I hate how fat I have become.
  23. I love that my husband accepts me for who I am , even if my butt keeps growing.
  24. I can't get enough reality tv.
  25. I like to read but never can find the time.
  26. My eldest daughter looks just like I did when I was her age.
  27. I am a total and complete camera-a-holic and I am addicted to taking pictures.
  28. I used to do extra, stand in and walk on work for TV shows and movies.
  29. I am going to be 29 in about a month.
  30. I am not at all apprehensive about turning 30.

Friday, April 11, 2008

Girl on Girl Hate/Stupidity

when i was growing up in HS it was pretty common to see to chicks fighting in the quad or in the halls. even a classroom or two. in fact my first day of high school i got bitch slapped by some little snatch and i ended up slamming her head into a locker before i gave her a black eye.

i am NOT proud of that. in fact i am ashamed and saddened that i let my anger get the best of me. but i am also proud that i didn't back down.

i saw on the news that several teens were arrested and will be tried as adults for kidnapping and harassing and assaulting a 14 year old.

what is wrong with people? did these kids actually think that this was ok?

i totally did my fair share of drug abuse from about 16 into my twenties. i drove drunk off my ass. i was wreckless and careless. but i did have some common sense.

how about the teens that posted a video on you tube showing the affects on a two year old after they gave her ecstasy?People are not really that stupid are they? I mean she was 2. she was obviously "rolling hard" as the other laughed at her. that poor little baby.

what in the eff are young people thinking? it scares me to death that my children will one day befriend some idiot who has idiots for parents and will get into trouble.

i am planning on locking my kids in their rooms till they are 18. and even then i may "lose" the keys.

shhhh, it's me

oh man am i glad to have a place to get it all out.

i have another blog but of course i blabbed all about it and now i have a steady stream of readers that include my family, in-laws and other people that must not ever know the things that i think in my head lest they judge me of course.

but something tells me that that there are plenty of other mothers, wives, daughter-in laws, daughters and friends out there who will share a lot of what i feel....